I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
