What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
