I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
