A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
