Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
