So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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