Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
The adults are the big ones right?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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