shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
