I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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