i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
