so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize