I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
my poor anus
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
