best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
