The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
My breasts were aching with rage.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
