anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
My vagina is officially offended.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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