wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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