alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
