operation have a gay friend backfired
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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