hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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