Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
