Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
