It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
