hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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