4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
