so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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