my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
