dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
