Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
