I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
