You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
