If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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