I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
they need to just BURY HIM!
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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