Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
