i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
