So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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