She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Mom said you looked used
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
