We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
