she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
