There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
