He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
