i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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