How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
