saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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