I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
