you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
