i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
