They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
