Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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