i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
