You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
